It's Proof Positive that Just Having a Law Degree Doesn't Make You a Writer
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Author: Phillip Margolin
Title: Proof Positive Genre: mystery If you believe Dick Wolf, our "criminal justice system is divided into two separate but equal parts." Actually, the creator of the seemingly bottomless well that is the "Law & Order" franchise factory understates the number of parts - as Anthony Zuiker, the creator of that other seemingly bottomless well (the "CSI" franchise) figured out. It takes an entire team working together for the justice system to function - and, no matter what law schools tell you, no one member is any more important than the others. Imagine, then, the chaos that might ensue if one of the cogs in the machinery of justice were to go all haywire: the guilty might go free - or perhaps worse, the innocent might be convicted. Portland, Oregon, is about to see just how chaotic things can get. Bernie Cashman would be a credit to any cop shop's crime lab. He's a consummate professional in the lab and at the crime scene, and his presence on the witness stand is nothing short of phenomenal. Any time there's an important case, Bernie's at the top of the call sheet. Except Bernie has a dirty little secret: he fakes evidence when he doesn't think his case is strong enough to take a suspect off the streets. He uses his power sparingly, however, and only "for good." In fact, Oregon just last week executed one of the evildoers he'd put away. Never mind that the man went to his grave proclaiming innocence - probably because he was innocent. Cashman's just turned up critical evidence in a new murder case, evidence that can put a brutal man behind bars. Hmmm.... think it's manufactured? We shall see. But before he can move on to his next case, one of his co-workers approaches him about "irregularities" in some of his old cases. Uh-oh: a definite crimp in Bernie's plans. Ahhh, but who better to commit the perfect murder than a crime scene investigator? Within hours, Bernie's nosy co-worker is dead and a letter-perfect frame has been constructed around a homeless paranoid schizophrenic with a reputation for violence. Fortunately for the good citizens of Portland, that homeless paranoid schizophrenic - Jacob Cohen by name - has very rich parents who can plunk down $100K for Amanda Jaffe to represent their son. With the intrepid, super-intelligent and darned good looking Jaffe (plus her father, Frank, and their crack investigator, Kate Ross) on the case, it will be but a matter of time before Cashman's scheme is exposed and everyone can breathe a sigh of relief. And then you can send this book back to the library, or get rid of it in a garage sale: talk about breathing a sigh of relief! Please, will somebody explain to me how Phillip Margolin ever got this book published?! Even more to the point, explain how it could be his eleventh novel?! If there has ever been Proof Positive that having a diploma from some second-rate law school doesn't mean you can write, this book is definitely that proof. Film critic Roger Ebert liked to make fun of what he called "idiot plots." Only an idiot, he said, would go back into the house where her friends were slashed to ribbons just because she forgot her cell. Only an idiot would pick up that knife beside his dead wife's body, leaving his fingerprints all over the murder weapon. Only an idiot would read a second Phillip Margolin novel. No, wait, I'm getting ahead of myself... The concept of a crooked CSI may be ripped from the headlines (there have been several recent cases of crime-lab personnel faking evidence), but the rest of Margolin's book might well have come from some Young Adult fiction. Think of plotting, and riddle me this: if you think one of your co-workers is faking his work - work that holds the power of life and death - do you take him aside and say, "You told the grand jury that Raymond Hayes left a fingerprint on that hammer, but you know that he didn't. I went through some of your other cases after I figured out what happened in Hayes. Two of them are really troubling me"? I know I sure wouldn't: see what I mean about an idiot plot? Besides a plot grounded in idiocy, his characters are also unabashedly stereotypical. We have the dapper Cashman, clad in hiking boots and multi-pocketed hunting vest at every crime scene (even indoors...). Then there's the beauteous but troubled Jaffe, pining away for the handsome ADA she dated after the second time a serial killer kidnapped her. There's the down-on-his-luck, extremely honest, god-fearing, and caring (though slightly chubby) young lawyer who serves as cannon fodder. Stereotypes, all. And the dialog Margolin puts in their mouths? It's as stilted as a carnival Uncle Sam - friends don't say things to each other like "I received a telephone call from Doug Weaver at three A. M." No, they say, "Doug Weaver called and got me out of bed at three in the morning." With cardboard characters, dialog that might have been written by a seventh-grader, and characters so stupid they almost deserve what happens to them, Proof Positive is all you need to realize that John Grisham is definitely not the worst writer ever to parlay a law degree into a publishing contract. Unless you've got a masochistic streak, give this book a wide berth. all content copyright © 2014 by scmrak
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